The Aim
by joseph.stein
Summary: Cuddy gets seriously sick but refuses everyone's help, especially House's. Will he manage to help her out? Houddy, HouseCuddyWilson friendship, HurtConfort
1. Go away

House was walking through the clinic trying to go away without attending to his clinic duty when he saw Cuddy coming towards him; he frowned but could not avoid her, and he got ready to be furiously bellowed forth, but she didn't even look at him while entering her office. He followed her and stood up in front of her.

"What happened?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Why didn't you bawl against me?"

"Why do I have to loose my time?"

"Because you always behave like a virago nagging at me"

"And you're always doing what you want, so this conversation is pointless for both of us."

"Are you angry for what I said some days ago?"

"I'm not angry"

"You are. You aren't even looking at me!"

"Do you think I should be?"

"Of course not, even if truth is a heavy burden to bear."

She stared at him, her deep expressive eyes full of bitter and defeat, and for once House felt guilty for his words.

"Hey, sunshine, calm down, I was joking."

"This is the problem with you, your brutal directness. However, you might have been right. I wouldn't have been a good mother."

"Why are you talking at the past tense?"

"I decided to give up."

House hushed. He was fazed. Did his words take part to this decision? Cuddy was not the kind of woman that easily acquiesce a setback. She was a rock. And since when she got offended for what House said? This was really really weird.

Cuddy chuckled, sitting behind her desk and mockingly rolling her eyes up at the man standing in front of her. She began to clear the clutter on her desk, then she stood up, and as she did so, she twitched slightly, her hand pressing firmly against her abdomen. House noticed, frowned, but didn't say anything, narrowing his eyes at her. Arm snaked tight around those files, she ran her hand through her forehead, and that's when he noticed the droplets of sweat along her hairline.

"Now, please, go away. I'm not really glad to chat with you today."

"Come on, you can't push me away like this. I was your sperm-donor adviser. You need me."

Cuddy closed her eyes for a moment, swallowing to stop tears coming out from her eyes and along her cheeks. She felt miserable.

"You were my friend, better I thought you were, and Wilson was too, but then you two… well, you broke my hope the most violently and brutally you were able to. There's nothing else to say, and now, please, go away."

The very excruciating pain she was experiencing since the day before was constant, but every 30 seconds or so there was a stabbing and throbbing sensation with pain even worse than what she could ever have imagined. Again, she pressed her hand to her abdomen with a sigh and he couldn't shut up any longer. "Something wrong with your stomach?"

"I'm perfectly fine, House. Go out please."

He did as he had been ordered to, and Lisa sat on her black couch, unable to prevent tears any more and hoping that nobody would have entered and seen her like that. Her dignity and her job were the only thing she had… She lost her dream, she discovered she couldn't count on her once-friends, she had no family. She felt desperately alone.

Moreover, she was definitely sick. She hadn't slept for the whole night trying to find a position that could ease the pain a little bit. She wasn't sure whether the couch, the waves of heat and chill passing through her body or the pain in her stomach had kept her awake and it mattered less and less as the minutes of misery slowly passed.

She realized her skin was burning and she decided to go home, even if it was early to leave the hospital.

Half an hour later she was laying on her bed, curled up into a foetal position, still weeping. Feeling cold, she pulled a blanket from the floor and wrapped it around her shoulders, shifting on the bed until her stomach settled back to the constant ache, rather than sharp pain. A wave of nausea struck, bringing with it another cold sweat that drenched Lisa's face, neck and chest. She struggled up from the bed, throwing off the blanket, and stumbling into the hallway and the tiny bathroom, barely making it in time.

"I should look for help." She thought, but decided to come back to bed. She was convicted there was nobody that would have helped her out.

When the worst wave of pain came, she passed out.

AN First of all, thank you very much for reading. I'm not a native speaker so sorry for my mistakes. I'd be glad and honoured to hear any comment from you. Both laudation and criticism will be welcomed. Please review!


	2. So Sad

When she came to it was early in the morning. The pain seemed to have decreased a little bit. Still nauseous, weak and feverish, she managed to get up and reach the toilet to gulp two pills, then two again, hoping that aspirin would have worked. She knew this was a stupid choice, but her rationality had disappeared. She went to work.

She was sitting at her desk trying to focus on the files she was reading when House entered her office.

"Still hating me?"

Lisa stood up but the pain came again, worst than ever. She clutched the desk, but even that couldn't hold her as she wobbled in place. Quickly she plummeted to the floor, and House instantly came close to her unconscious body.

He was terrified. She was his boss, his rock. What was happening to her?

He need her.

A minute later she came to, and he decided to check her immediately.

"Lisa, I need to put you on your back." he said and began gently guiding her back.

"No . . .." she moaned as House moved her.

"Is it your right side?"

"It was. I don't know now."

"I'm just gonna take your pulse," House advised, lifting his left arm and placing two fingers on the inside of her wrist.

"When did the symptoms start?"

"Can't remember. Maybe a week ago."

"How much aspirin did you ingest?"

"Four doses. Maybe five."

"Temp's 104.6, pulse 140, B.P. 85/60, respirations rapid."

"I want to check your stomach, now." Greg said, and gently lifted her shirt.

"No . . . don't," she moaned, and with and excruciating expression of pain on her face she sat up.

"What the HELL are you doing? Where do you think you are going?"

"The first thing I want is you out of this room. The second one is to go home. Alone." she lisped, and he noticed she was breathing hardier and hardier as the minutes passed.

"You can't. You can hardly breath."

"I'm grown up, you know, I don't need your permission to go."

"Oh, stop it! Don't be so childishly stubborn. Do you think risking your own health is a good way to take revenge on me? And, definitely, you need my permission. I'm your doctor, and I'm going to admit you."

"You aren't my doctor anymore."

"Good joke. Try again."

"I'm not joking. Brian Sholling is now."

"He's an idiot!"

"I trust him."

"You shouldn't."

Lisa tried to stand up but failed and almost fell down. Although she was making all her efforts to show to House she wasn't feeling bad she cried out and clutched his arm. He guided her until the couch and made her lay down.

"Come on. Let me check on you."

"Why, House?"

"Because you are in a lot of pain, and you need medical help."

"No. Why did you make me understand I was so unhappy and alone?" she whispered weeping.

House froze. He looked for something ironic or fun to say but couldn't find nothing. He wouldn't ever had imagined he had provoked such a deep tsunami in her interior world.

He started the examination and realized how serious the situation was, while Lisa was proven wrong when his hand settled on his terribly aching, wooden-like abdomen. Her eyes flew open and she let out an agonizing groan.

"You are an idiot, Dr. Cuddy. This is bad. It could be peritonitis. You need to be operated immediately." he said trying to look self-confident while he was scared to death.

"No. Not here. Call an ambulance. I want to go to Metropolitan General."

"There is no time. You could die during the way in."

"Would you be sad?"

"It would be hard to work with another boss. I'd miss your… well, you know what."

"You wouldn't, and neither anybody would. I wouldn't be." she said. She was looking confused but also so desperate and alone. It wasn't just the fever that made her talk like this.

"Don't be silly."

"This isn't your decision, House. Please. Call the ambulance and go away. There is no need you come with me, no need you pretend to care of me. I know the truth. Go away."

AN Thank you very much to everybody who reviewed. This is really important for me. Hope you all will let me know what you think about the second chapter, I'd be GLAD to hear it. cuddy/house shipper: I think my story will be 60 general-illness 20 romance 20 friendship. If there is something in particular you would like to read please let me know, we could work on it. 


	3. Emergency

House gave her an angry glance and said:

"You're right. I don't care about you at all. You are free to die if you want to, but please, make sure you sign my holidays' request before." He laughed. "Fuck you Cuddy".

He went out of the room and all he wanted to do was to go on the roof to think, but he went to the canteen to look for Ann Malley, the best surgeon of the hospital. When he found her, she was having breakfast, alone.

"Hey Ann"

"Good morning to you too, Greg."

"I think you should go to the boss' office. She may need your help."

"Are you joking?"

"I'm not. She needs a surgery right now, but she is so stubbornly concerned in privacy that she wants to be admitted to Metropolitan General. Maybe you can convince her she need to be in an OR as soon as possible."

"If you are mocking on me, well, that's not fun at all."

House started to become impatient. This was a waste of time.

"Damn it, go upstairs to check her conditions on your own, but do it now!"

Ann understood he was serious and immediately stood up.

"Come with me."

"You don't need a diagnostician. Bye bye Ann."

When he reached the roof, he sat down and stared at the skyline. He was furious with her, so furious he couldn't even breathe.

He hated her because she was so stupid and didn't care of her health.

He hated her because she thought he didn't care about her.

He hated her because she was the only one he had a real respect for, the only one whose opinion was really crucial to him.

He hated her because she was so clever, and sensible as well, and because her words always made him meditate about his actions.

He hated her because her dialectic was as harsh as his own was, and because she was the only one able to win him while arguing about anything.

He hated her because she was so professional and serious, and so fascinating at the same time.

He hated her because she thought he hated her, but, first of all, he hated her because he didn't hate her at all.

"This is going to drive me crazy," he said to himself.

OOO

As soon as Greg went away, Lisa started crying again. She was quite scared of her reaction; she wasn't used to cry as she was doing.

The pain was unbearable now, and she knew her temperature had risen up because of the fact that her sight was whitish and confused. Dr. Cuddy was aware this was a real emergency and that her life was in danger but Lisa wasn't able to do anything anymore. Her mind had stopped working, and all she really wanted to do was to sit on her couch and cry, even if she didn't actually know why.

She closed her eyes and thought she would just have passed out right there, when a slim, graceful figure came closer to her, and she recognized Ann Malley.

"What's up?" Lisa asked to herself. "How the hell did she know?" She tried to talk, but no voice came out of her mouth. Finally, the pain disappeared and everything became dark.

At the same time, Ann's heart was beating faster and faster. Her boss was lying on a couch, far too hot at the touch and unconscious. This was one of the worst situations she would have imagined to find herself in.

"Cuddy, hey, do you hear me? Can you talk? Do you recognize me?"

She got no answer.

"My God, oh my God" Ann said to himself. She had to discover what the problem was immediately. House was right. If that damned ass had come with her, everything would have been easier than it was.

Firstly, as she usually did, she checked her pulse, temperature and blood pressure. The pulse was speed but weak, the pressure far too low and the temperature 104.9. Bad news.

She lifted her blouse and her lab coat, pressed her hand on her stomach and felt as if she was touching a stone table. There was slight distension and guarding. Here was the problem.

She remained astonished looking at Lisa. She was a doctor; she should have noticed something before going over the edge. Why did she let things go so far away?

However, there was no time to waste. She run out and asked some stretcher bearer to bring a barrow, and then she went to the OR to get herself ready to operate.

If the patient had been anybody else, she would have explained to the family there was quite no hope to fix the situation, but this time she knew she had to believe into miracles. That woman was an idol for any other female worker. She couldn't be betrayed from her own creatures.

Twenty minutes again, she started her work. She was helped from her colleague Michael Norrington, the anestheitst Jolanda Bart and two nurses, the best surgery equip the hospital could provide. Nobody else had been informed of what was happening, and they thought nobody else was in. They didn't notice the deep blue eyes hidden behind the OR's glass.

AN Thank you all very very much for the reviews. You know, writing in a foreign language is a hard work; I'm trying to improve and doing the best I can, so it's really encouraging for me to know that someone appreciate my efforts. Please don't stop it! I'm looking forward to hearing from you about this new chapter: do you like it? Do you have any suggestion or criticism? Please let me know. To answer to a question, I'm a boy, I'm twenty-two, half Italian and half Greek. Thanks again!


	4. Betrayed

House was still sitting behind the observation deck when he heard his pager ring and noticed Wilson's office code on it. He took his cell phone and sent him a sms: "Come to the OR 7".

After a while he arrived, a wide smile on his face.

"You can't imagine what happened. I just saw Claire Merrison having sex with Arnold behind the reception desk in the lounge. Why the hell did you want me to come here?"

"Look at the patient." he answered, and there was no sign of his usual sarcasm in his voice.

Wilson turned his head with an inquiring glance and suddenly blanched.

"What… when… Oh my God."

"They started three hours ago and I don' think they are going to finish soon."

"What happened?"

"I don't know exactly. She was sick yesterday, and this morning she fainted. It could be peritonitis but I'm not sure."

"Did you examine her?"

"Yes, but she didn't want to. She's furious at me, and at you too."

"I think that's not notable at the moment. What did you find out?"

Greg took a deep breath.

"Well, if the patient had been anyone else I would have recommended coffin shopping."

Wilson was astonished and wordless. Half an hour ago, he was working and now he was waiting to know if Lisa would have survived or not.

"She didn't tell any of us she was sick. Do you think she tell someone else?"

"Do you think anybody with a regular QI wouldn't have forced her to consult a doctor?"

Jimmy gazed at the floor.

"House, do you think we have been too cruel? I mean, I don't think she couldn't be a mother. I was just… well, I was angry."

"Everybody knows what I said, but what did you say to make her decide to give up?"

"She decided what?"

"Come on, Jimmy, answer to my question."

"I… I told her I was glad I wasn't her sperm donor because I wouldn't have liked to be the father of a frustrated and unhappy child, and that this was the only way her child could have ended up to being."

"Wow. Sounds cruel. So you aren't the candy man as I always thought."

"I didn't mean what I saw."

"Neither did I" House whispered.

"Is it real? Am I seeing Greg-I-am-always-right-House feeling guilty?"

House gave a deep sigh. He hadn't ever felt like this before. Keeping people far away from him had been his priority during these years, but now he felt as if he was to lose something far more precious. He couldn't lose her; he wasn't just too strong to survive, although he didn't know why.

"If she… you know, there is more than one thing she's going to need to fix. She deserves to see someone next to her when she wakes up. She's going to suffer a lot."

"She has no family, and no close friends, except for me and you."

"Me, you and her best friend. Her roommate at college. The one she lost because of you. You can't have forgotten she was her friend before being yours."

"I haven't."

"Considering the fact that she doesn't want to talk to us, we need to call her."

"You can do it."

"You know I can't. Come on Greg."

House hesitantly took his cell phone and dialled the number he had learned by heart time ago. A male voice answered.

"066-931-1255548, Mark speaking."

"Hi Mark. It's Greg House. I need to talk to Stacy."

"Why?"

"That's none of your business."

"Ok, ok, calm down. I'm calling her. Oh, I finished my PT. I can walk again. Aren't you glad to hear it? Bye bye House."

After a while, Stacy answered.

"Greg. How are you?"

"Not as well as your Mark is, however, that's not the point. I need you to come here."

Stacy laughed.

"Of course, you whistle and I came. Sure. What's up? Steve McQueen is missing me?"

"Cuddy is sick. She is really sick. She's in the OR right now. It's serious. She needs someone close to her."

"What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about this now. Come here, I'll explain you everything."

"Why do I have to come? She has you and Wilson."

"We had a… well, we can call it a little row."

"You treated her like crap and want me to come and fix things. That's an old story."

"I don't want you to come to help me to fix it. I want you here because I think she doesn't deserve to be alone. In the last few days, she has had… problems. She needs her only female friend close to her."

"I can't come, Greg. Mark is going to kill me if I come back where you are."

"You didn't understand what I said. She is very sick. She could die, Stacy. She is depressed. Don't you remember she was here for you when Mark was ill? When you were sad for him and for me? She even found the way to offer you a job to let you stay next to your husband!"

"I'm thankful for it, but I just can't come. You almost broke my marriage, Greg. I can't risk it again."

"We aren't talking about me and you! I won't even talk to you if it makes you feel more comfortable, but you can't leave her alone!"

"That's all, Greg. I simply can't." she said, and hung up.

AN Hello everybody! Hope you all like this chapter. I know Stacy is portrayed like evil, but I cannot stand her. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, thanks with all my heart. Please go on letting me know your opinion, this is really important for me!

Linda: grazie mille! E' magnifico parlare in italiano qui! Per la cronaca, vivo in Italia perciò questa è la mia lingua madre. Aspetto con ansia di sentire la tua opinione su questo capitolo. A presto!


	5. Focuses

"Stacy isn't going to come. She doesn't want to hurt Mark coming back here where I am."

"Oh."

"She's not the woman I remembered. That woman wouldn't have let her friend alone. Damn it! She didn't even know whether she will be able to talk to her again!"

"So, it's just me and you."

"Just me and you" House repeated. He didn't manage to imagine how they would have fixed this.

Five everlasting hours had passed, and the two men were still sitting in the same position, in the same place, waiting in silence.

When the surgery finished, Ann told them to meet outside waving with her hand.

"So?" House asked.

"Honestly, I don't know what to say. It was really over the edge. I suppose we stopped the infection, but there are almost a thousand of things that could go wrong."

"Did you find out how it started?"

"Well, it was obviously peritonitis. We found two focuses, which is something I haven't ever seen before. The first one was ruptured appendix, the second one was..."

"Was?"

"I don't know if I should tell you this."

"Oh, fuck you Ann! She would have died if I hadn't called you."

"These are confidential details."

"I'm her doctor. I need to know it."

Ann looked at him with an inquiring glance, and then she decided she would have told them the truth. Definitely, there were worst problems at the moment.

"She had an extrauterine pregnancy."

They both remained astonished. Ann went on.

"She must have been sick in the past few days. She must have felt a lot of pain. I can't imagine why she didn't consult a doctor."

"Neither can I." Wilson said.

"She's in the ICU now. You can see her if you want to."

"We'll be there in a minute. We need to talk." House answered, trying to make her understand he wanted her to go away.

As soon as they were alone again, he said to Wilson:

"She was pregnant, and she didn't tell anybody."

"Maybe she didn't know it."

"She didn't do artificial fecundation. She has not been absent from work. She must have used the classic way. She made sex with somebody. I wonder with whom."

"House! Do you think this is really important right now?"

"It will be." he answered, and then he went towards the ICU.

After a while, he was sitting next to her bed, desperately desiring to share all this pain with her. This was the first time in his life he felt empathy for someone else

Lisa was so weak, that she didn't appear to be breathing, which was extremely scaring. She was always so strong, so active. Greg took her right hand in his own. Her skin was pale and cool. He hoped it was the dim lighting that made her usually golden colouring seem so pale.

Suddenly, he realized something that made him freeze. She was under painkillers, and that could explain why she was sleeping so hard. What was really weird was the expression on her face. She hasn't been so quiet and peaceful since ages. He couldn't even remember the last time he saw a non-angsty look on her. He was so used to seeing her worried and gloomy that he didn't notice she hasn't smiled since months.

"You couldn't believe it. I can't even figure out why I feel like that, but what I really want in this moment is to fix you. To take care of you. To make you feel well again. To make you happy." he thought, aware of the fact that he wouldn't ever admitted this to anybody.

He put his cane on the night table and his head on the pillow next to hers, and then he fell asleep.

AN Thank you very much for the reviews. You all are wonderful! Please let me know what you think about that. As usual, both criticism and laudation are welcome. Sorry for my mistakes. Bye!

Grazie anche a tutti i recensori italiani... mi sento meno solo ora! Non mi abbandonate. A presto!


	6. Smiling

When Lisa woke up, she felt weird, as if there was too much light in the room. Her head was aching badly, and she felt still nauseous and weak. She tried to move but didn't manage to do it; she couldn't understand where she was, but she supposed she was in a hospital room, considering the fact that her stomach-ache wasn't too bad now, it was quiet, soft, and she understood she was under painkillers.

She opened her eyes and saw the ICU's greenish ceiling above her. The last thing she could remember was herself lying on the couch; someone must have found her and called a doctor, who had probably sent her to the OR as soon as possible.

She turned her head right and clearly distinguish a thin silhouette sleeping in the faint light, the head on the same pillow she had hers on; as soon as her eyes got used to the dim light, she realized it was House.

"What the hell is he doing here?" she thought, still sick at heart by Greg's and James' behaviour. They had been cruel. It hadn't been what they said, she was strong enough to bear their words, but how they said it that hurt her; they had spoke as if their anger, which was due to a stupid job issue, was important enough to break her unique dream the most violently they were able to. They gave her the impression they felt legitimated to ignore her own feelings, as if that was an argument between strangers, as if they haven't known her long enough to care of her.

She thought they were friends, but she went wrong. She misjudged them, especially House. There was no human feeling in him, nothing hidden behind his mask of sarcasm. This was the real House, the one who had no need to stay there with her.

She called him to wake him up. She wanted him out of her room immediately.

"House. House, come on, wake up." she said the most loudly she was able to.

He opened his eyes, giving her a sleepy glance.

"Good morning sunshine. Did you sleep well? I did. These ICU beds are comfortable. I think I'll stay here until you are dismissed."

"Go away, House. Out of here."

"Hey hey, calm down. I saved your life, you know. You should be more thankful."

She opened her mouth to reply but she felt too weak, so she just looked at him with a begging glance in her eyes.

"Don't stare at me like a beaten puppy, please, you know I'm prayers-resistant. I'm not going away, so it would be better if you close your eyes and come back to sleep. How are you feeling?"

"That's none of your business." she whispered.

"Stop it. You're becoming boring."

"Weak and nauseous." she finally admitted.

"You'll feel better soon, just relax and sleep. Jimmy is here to take care of any medical issue. He's a responsible man, you know, you can rely on him."

"What about you?"

"Well, my role is… animation and drama, I suppose."

She smiled.

"Are you forgiving me?"

"Not yet."

"That's a good start." he said and smiled, too, and Lisa thought this was his most spontaneous smile of ever. There was no sarcasm on his face, just mildness, yes, mildness, and concern. This was really cute.

Amazingly, he came closer to her and kissed her on her forehead.

"You need your rest. Come on, close your eyes. I'm not going away, this is a wonderful way to avoid clinic duty."

This time House saw a beam on her lips, and he felt the euphoric urge to laugh, although he didn't know why. He took her hand and hold it tight, waiting for her to fall asleep, when he noticed a throe on her face.

"Is it my fault?" he asked leaving her hand.

"No." she answered with a moanful voice. "It's a sharp pain on the right side. It's excruciating."

Painful tears were crossing her cheeks.

"Please, Greg, make it stop."

"Don't worry, sunshine. I will. You're not alone, I'm here. Don't worry."

AN _Thanks a lot to all the reviewers. Please, don't stop telling me your opinion, this is important for me. I hope you all have a brilliant, joyful 2007. I'm sure you all deserve it. __Happy new year!_

_Grazie a tutti I recensori italiani. Non mi abbandonate ragazzi. Auguro a voi tutti un anno nuovo felice e ricco di soddisfazioni e serenità, e un capodanno spumeggiante. _


	7. Weird

For the second time in a day, House was waiting to know if Lisa would have survived the surgery or not. Her second surgery had started three hours before and there was still no news coming from the OR.

Waiting alone was one of the worst things he had experienced. He had tried to page Wilson, but he had got no answer. He had even thought about calling Cameron, her optimism was exactly what he was in need of at the moment, but nobody knew what happened to Lisa, except for the surgery equip, Wilson and himself, and he was sure that was Lisa wanted.

His thoughts were interrupted by Ann entering his office.

"So?"

"She is out of danger now, but I have bad news for you. I saw on her file she was under estrogens. Was she trying to have a baby?"

"Yes, she was."

"She had an haemorrhage, and we haven't been able to stop it. We did an hysterectomy."

"You did what? YOU DID WHAT?"

"House, calm down. This was the only way to save her life."

He looked at him. Seeing Gregory House concerned for another human being was just… weird.

"Do you want me to talk to her?"

"No, I'm going to tell her the truth."

"She should be awake in half an hour."

"Ok. Thanks Ann."

When Greg entered her room she was still sleeping.

"I wish you could sleep forever, sunshine. " he thought.

Staring at her, he suddenly realized something that made him froze.

This was not him. This was not Gregory House. He wasn't the kind of man who spends his time helping his friends. He was not kind and giving. He was not sweet. He does not comfort anybody. He does not worry about people, and does not worry about Lisa.

There was a voice in his head saying he was making a mistake, saying that his deeper himself really wanted to take care of Lisa, but the usual cynic and selfish House didn't heard it.

As soon as he saw Lisa open her eyes, he told her the truth.

"How are you feeling?"

"Quite fine" she whispered.

"Well, you aren't going to feel fine anymore. They did you an hysterectomy. You won't ever be able to have children."

His heart was saying "You fool, dry her tears.", but his mind was saying "now let go". He saw her eyes full of tears, he saw desperation on her face, and he saw a part of her dying just in front of him. She needed someone close to her, to hug her, but he did nothing.

"I'm sorry, Cuddy. I don't want to help you." he said, and hating himself he went away.

AN Sorry for the shortness of this chapter, the next one will be longer, I promise. Thank you for the wonderful reviews. What do you think about this? I hope that House will realize his true feelings for Lisa. Let me know whether you like it or not.


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